How deal with and handle a stubborn wife

How deal with and handle a stubborn wife

King Solomon – “It is better to dwell in the corner of the housetop, than with a contentious woman in a wide house”

Marriage is an institution that should be enjoyed and happy, virtually every day millions of people always dream of the happy day they will be the nuptial knot with their loved one. There is no one that dream of problem in marriage or either envisage problem in their marital life. At certain point, if you are in a relationship with a stubborn client you must learn how to deal and tolerate a stubborn spouse. Even though your wife may likely not to be really stubborn in nature but some are naturally stubborn and arrogant.

When we say someone is stubborn it means someone is unreasonable and often refuses to change their mind about a particular issue, ideas, or an action. When mostly asked why stubborn they can’t give a particular or genuine reason for their stubbornness or resistance. There are some reasons that might be responsible for your wife stubbornness.

angry woman or angry wife

Defending and idea/action: There are some people that have the belief that if their idea, suggestion, interest or point is neglected then they are unimportant to you. They easily personalized their idea to themselves. They always think their real identity is threatened if people or their husband is not convinced with what she is saying.

Given the fact that every human is unique, every human has many different characteristics that is conflicting with that of another individual. A partner that is not willing or ready to give in or submit to his/her idea or action and always want to have her way means problem in her marriage. I will be discussing some useful tips and ideas on how you can handle that stubborn wife and rejuvenate happiness, joy. Loving someone means you have to accept them and understand them. I know that getting around them is not going to be easy, but once you get used to this ideas and tips that will be discussed soon you will find yourself being able to deal effectively with your stubborn wife.

Understand why you wife is stubborn

The reason for your wife stubbornness might be because you are not seeing the logic behind her decisions. Try to reason and see things from their own perspectives, there are times while our judgment is clouded by self interest, anger or frustration. When you are learning about how to go about to handle or deal with your wife you have to remember that when you are in a relationship it means that you have made up your mind to work differences and also make sacrifices for her. There are definitely going to be some differences knowing that we humans are not the same and we come from different background, which is the first step in resolving issues.

Pick your battle

If your wife seems that she won’t just back down, don’t waste time trying to argue, nag, yell, or complain otherwise it makes the situation worsen. If a decision means too much to your partner let them know you support them this time and try to make them understand that when it comes to your position it means more to you too and you will ask for support in return. You have to choose your priorities and be ready to lose the rest.

Spend quality time together

What is the major reason why you are married? Is it just to have kids? The marriage is meant to be companionship which many people long to have but sometimes they never get. Your spouse should be your best friend and confidant.

Understand one another

You must try to listen to your spouse and try to understand her. There are times it can be the reverse of what they are saying but you have to listen and observe her body language and eye contacts.

Take positive approach

The key is for you to know how to deal with a stubborn wife is to avoid hostility or violence of any kind or confrontation. Fighting and exchanging of words or blows is never an answer or solution. The most important thing is to keep it cool and level head, because this while give you a good leverage so that you will be able to talk and negotiate the issue calmly, properly and reasonably. There is nothing a soft and good talk or response can’t resolve. Often times ego and pride gets in their way, so when you provide proof to your points so agreement can be perceived in the light of the evidence and not that they have a change of mind. Dealing with a stubborn wife can be especially more challenging when they tends to be more narrow-minded. However, when patient and keeping in mind that learning on tips and ways to handle your effectively will guarantee you happy and successful marital relationship. I believe with all these mentioned tips you will effectively make use of them and give your relationship happy boost.

Practice Active Listening

Effective communication is key to handling a stubborn wife. It is essential to communicate in a way that does not escalate the situation. One effective strategy is to use “I” statements instead of “you” statements. For instance, instead of saying, “You are being stubborn,” say, “I feel frustrated when I don’t feel heard.”

Active listening is another important communication strategy. When your wife is speaking, give her your full attention and avoid interrupting her. Repeat back what she has said to ensure that you have understood her correctly. This will help her feel heard and validated, which can help diffuse the situation.

Seek help from experienced counselors.

If your wife’s stubbornness is causing significant problems in your relationship, it may be helpful to seek professional help. Counseling or therapy can help you and your wife address underlying issues and develop effective communication strategies.

It is important to find a qualified professional who has experience working with couples. You can ask for recommendations from friends or family members or search online for qualified professionals.

Self Reflect

Remember you could be a trigger for the behavior. Dealing with a stubborn wife can be emotionally draining. It is important to take care of yourself and reflect on your own behavior. Self-care can include activities such as exercise, meditation, or spending time with friends.

Self-reflection is also important in dealing with a stubborn wife. Reflect on your own behavior and communication style. Are there areas where you can improve? Are there ways that you can communicate more effectively with your wife?

Read on how to deal with a narcissist

The real problem may be that your spouse or woman is a narcissist, if she has an inflated sense of their own importance, a deep need for admiration and a lack of empathy for others. But behind this mask of ultra-confidence lies a fragile self-esteem that’s vulnerable to the slightest criticism. Then you can read more about how to deal with a narcissist here.

62 Comments to “How deal with and handle a stubborn wife”

  1. I have a very stubborn wife,i want to go meet their parents,but she has told me severely that she has been bad dreams about me,i buy her everything she wants but i don’t see any change in her so far,we are married for 2 years and one kid.

    1. Harry

      Material things will not fix the issue. My know it all wife, who I love dearly, is better off left alone. She can screw what ever it is up. I stay out of it. This is hard to do. But we have been together 25 years. Until I stopped caring how she does things we fought. EX: I am by far the better cook. She will tell one that. When I see her over cooking….I say nothing. As time has gone on we get along better because I stopped caring if the meal is a mess. “Do you need any help in the kitchen?” Is now answered with a yes. Instead of me telling her “you are doing it wrong” Just sit back have a glass of wine and the meal will be fine in the end.

  2. NK

    The problem is that stubborn wife never accepts her mistake and is not willing to compromise anything (even if your points are stronger and things should not be done the way she wants), absolutely nothing; and want everything to be her way. However, a husband cannot always agree and do what the stubborn wife wants, although tries everything to make her happy. In other words, if things are not going according to her “book” of rules, she will never compromise. So far it has been tried, but authors suggestion that “There is nothing a soft and good talk or response can’t resolve”, doesn’t work. In turn, it makes stubborn wife happier that she is about to have things done her way. Stubborn wife never listens to anyone. But I strongly believe, that if somehow you can find a person that she can see as a mentor, she might be getting softer eventually. The only problem is, will you have enough strength and patience? Most of the time, the answer is yes, but this answer really means “yes, I will do my best”. However, it is extremely difficult to change someones character unless they themselves want that and agree that she will work with you in resolving the problem.

    1. Gorr

      You know what, it never worked for me. She was just unhappy soul. Didn’t get along with none of her sisters, nor the parents. After years, and years of trying, I just couldn’t do it anymore. Emotionally it was too much for me. I would rather be miserable alone, than with her.

      1. Tony

        I’m agree with you , better alone than bad company, I’m in the same situation, I’m only stay for my daughter I don’t want to see her become my wife or one of my sisters in law or worst my mother in law, queen of stubbornness

      2. Chris

        Am going through that she does not get along with her family and my family for that matter.It’s not easy staying with a stubborn wife…For the past 4 years I was soft and patient but it never worked for me..took my patience for weakness

      3. samboy

        I think the same thing is happening to me n i don’t think i will take it any more i d rather be alone than with her I have tried bt she just got to my throat.

    2. xzbit

      same with me bro. You know the scary part, during “I love you moments”, she sometimes say that she want to live with me in heaven also. .. I am like (Bruh.. rele) yeah we should.

  3. Harry Weston

    I’ve been with my ‘wife’ for 14 years and we have 2 teenage boys. I am quite chilled about most things but will step up to the mark on things that do concern me/us. She, however, is serious about everything and her opinion is always right. She will (and is) ruining the life’s of our children to prove a point to my parents, who she hates passionately (except when they give her gifts and food !). Money of course does come into play with lots of things, not having enough and trying to keep up aithntge Jones’ doesn’t help. She comes from a women led family into mine which is the opposite. She has been struggling to get her own way which causes a lot of arguments.
    I don’t want to divorce as it will ruin the kids minds with the elder about to start secondary school, but it’s now at the point where she is now, as always spiteful, insulting and swearing with the kids in ear shot. Totally ungrateful about things she has got ( i must admit i have given her things late in life, because of lack of money at the time, but as providing, ie. gold Wedding ring wasn’t enough carats, whats a bigger house than our current 4 bed which i do understand and am working towards, but not fast enough for her liking!! ) Whenever we argue she does so in front of the eldest, (using him as a pawn in her game!), I don’t know how they would react to divorce, but it’s better to eat a crumb peacefully but a feast in stress….
    Sorry for the long email, just needed to get things off my chest….

    1. Joram Arentved

      The same here, She doesn’ t love me without being against me being just myself! J.A.,

  4. Dd

    My wife is both stubborn and close minded. I find that the worst thing to do is argue about things. The best is just to do my own thing.

    It is not always easy to do my own thing. I married so that I could have a companion in life…not a resistor. She uses the children as pawns and shows little appreciation for what I do at work. Throughout our 10 years of marriage she has worked very little while I have worked myself to insanity.

    2 years ago her father who was also very stubborn committed suicide upon having severe debt and not working for many years. Many people tried to help him although in his stubborn and closed minded ways he was too good to accept others help. Even after this I can’t get her to see how her stubborn ways are are suffocating our marriage.

    My biggest complaint is an unwillingness to do things together and also a low drive for money. She seems to want to recreate the way she grew up. She was born out of wedlock when her parents were young and as a result they grew up not having much and her dad worked extra hard to provide for the family. Her mom’s main role was to take care of kids. This seems to be reflected on our relationship.

    1. Buda Chi

      couldn’t agree with you more there Dd. my wife doesn’t work, never worked. no passion for work nor career. tried career guidance, talks, nothing happened. no change. she believe wife duty is to take care of the family. cook, clean, just all households chores. it is too much for me at times cause I feel why am I with her if she doesn’t contribute to my life. her mom was hard working, took them to school with money she made from selling on the street. I don’t know where she got this from. really frustrating . this after 20yrs of marriage and 4 girls.

  5. Jack

    Same story! Wah!
    We’ve been in marriage for 2yrs now, with a son, 1yr. She’s simply sturborn. I have tried being patient and i simply don’t know what to do next.
    She always wants things done her way at a her time…..which includes sex, when she feels like. Do people change? How does one cope with this?

  6. J. M

    As I read you posts, it all sinks in my head. My wife is very stubborn. She wants things done her way. She not only uses the kids to get what she wants but also sex. We haven’t had sex for almost 7 months now. We recently moved and now she requested to sleep alone in the kids room while they slept with me. I don’t want to divorce , but I am thinking off doing that at this point!!!

  7. J. M

    Plus I work my ass 7 days a week. She had c section twice for both of our boys 2 and 4 years old. I told her not to work and stay home to rest and take of our kids. I provide her with a bi weekly stipend $850 just to get whatever she wants. I do everything else and the stubborn gene in her DNA is never satisfy. I am a man. I need a companion, love , sex, and a family and not a rebel wife who thinks her ideas should always be right. It is really tiring. I just feel like getting a room somewhere and stay for sometime while I take care of my kids and see how she reacts. I am frankly and honestly damn tired.

  8. am also married for two years with two kids,
    my wife too is a very stubborn wife.
    one thing I discover about a stubborn wife , is that they are never grateful for what they have, they think that submitting to their husbands means foolishness, and they think that ignoring their opinion means you don’t love them, which is wrong.
    I love my wife, my children and my marriage but I wonder why my wife is the obstacle to peace and happiness in our marriage, I don’t want to divorce her and I don’t want to raise my children in such atmosphere of her stubbornness, but am praying and trusting God to calm down the storm in our marriage.
    thanks to the author and all of you that comments, I have gathered all the contributions and suggestions to produce a better way of handling her.
    The Lord God Almighty is my strength.
    all I will advise you all is to continue in prayers and trusting God .
    I pray for peace into our marriages in Jesus name

    1. Paul K M

      At times God is silent because things arent done his way, the bible says a wife is to submit to her husband as a command not a request; we give them too much rope then complain, women are insatiable and every bit of rope you give them only encourages their bad behaviour.
      its like pleading to the devil to go away then go to God complaining and crying, know your place in the house hold. Rule your house hold period, the old ways were always best ; we want to be fair and equal; we are not equals.

      1. Lou

        Wow Paul, are you from seventeenth century? Women are like pitbulls. They are power of life and nature, they are multi-talented, they are creators. No wonder if some time to time they eat your face if the only way they are treated is with opression. We have to learn how to live with them, to be stronger together. To-get-her, got it?

        1. Scott

          Paul is correct with his analysis. A wife is to submit to her husband. The husband rules the house. He makes the ultimate decision about everything. “Lou” is the typical simp, white knight, beta male, trying to get approval from his wife. Wife does not want approval or a “friendship” with a man. She can get friendship from her woman friends.

          Woman want a leader, someone who they love and respect and submit to. “Lou” is a simp. Even his reply is weak with “Wow Paul, are you from the seventeenth century” which is a feminine, emotional response. And even if Paul is from the 17th century, this is what needs to be done. Paul is likely getting respect, admiration, and lots of sex from his wife.

          Lou is probably getting sympathy sex and a wife who is cheating on him because “Lou” is behaving like a feminist who claims she wants equality and everything equal, yet at hates the man who gives her this because she subconsciously yearns for a leader.

          If you want a woman to love you be a leader. It’s not about having 6-pack abs or a good body, although it is a good idea to stay in shape so other women want you, as women are sheep and tend to want what other women want.

          To men: Be the leader. You are not her friend. You are the leader and her lover and your marriage is an arrangement where you LEAD the way.

          Treat your wife like a little girl because most women are like little girls, with very little to offer. Their job is to have children and cook delicious meals and clean the house. Your job as a man is to earn money, provide for the family, protect the family, and lead the way.

          A husband and a wife are not equals. The husband is superior. And the woman needs to be reminded of this through his actions.

  9. Kelving

    I’VE been married for 3years now and no kids yet. My wife is very stubborn. she has done a lot of things to me which I have beared in my heart. She has even committed adultery which I forgave. I can’t list what she has done to me and my heart. I am in pains with her.. People think I am wicked but not knowing what my wife do to me on secrete. She puts on her innocent face and good character outside. And gives me stubbornness and bad character inside the house. Recently she was working with me as a secretary in d office where I do printing work. She likes some customers and hates some which is not good for my business.. any little thing she tells me she is not going to that office anymore I will have to beg for her to resume work. But now she has said it again becos of 1 slight misunderstanding. And she says she wants to go outside and look for work and off which I cannot watch her suffer as a worker to another boss. But it seems she should text a little of suffering so that she will respect me. She even opened her mouth and told me I am too small. I cried in front of her when she said that to me, I didn’t sleep at home for 2 days. My wife has been d only problem I’ve been facing. How can a man has many problem in this world and ur wife will be one of the biggest problem?

    1. emmy

      Please report her to God in 7days fasting and prayers. Be holy don’t cheat on her and see what God will do. It’s a spiritual battle.

    2. Jeremy

      Dude no kids… that’s the only reason we keep our stubborn wives. Run, run fast. Or you will regret it when you do have a kid.

    3. Paul

      Please run my brother, you have no kids with her and she has no respect for you.
      if their no children involved run and never look back, not all women are cheats…you will get some one loyal.
      the bible says you can divorce your wife for adultery; your good with God if you leave her!!

  10. Suresh

    Dear All,
    After reading all your comments ought to believe, I’m not the only one suffering & you guys have more issues than me….
    I used to meditate which gives me calm otherwise my divorce would have happen so early.
    I’m married 10 years with 3 kids & I’m sacrificing my life, hapiness coz of my kids.
    I personally know kids who raise without parents & how they are going to end up & no want same fate for my kids.
    not had any single full month with joy in past 10 years as one or other fights with my wife…I’m really a calm guy & normally doesn’t fight as my initial days of marriage,,,, i’m really fed of this life & my kids are the only reason keeping me alive,,,, I was a good boozer and now i’m really changed..
    I have my mistakes & admitted all more than 1000 times, but whenever fight broke-out she’s hanging to all past & keep nailing me.
    I’m not fighting as I dont want my kids to be depressed as my parents never fought in front of us even though they have disputes. my brothers, sisters all are very quite people & our parents thought us the calmness in life.
    however i need my kids to be good humans & who will honor, value the lives & help, love each other where ever rather than becoming doctors or engineers without sence.
    thnx for the creator of this site.

  11. John

    My wife is so stubborn that every time we pick a quarrel my wife tells every one that i want to kill her.The reason she doesnt want to tell me about her movements when i ask she backs at me.Surprisingly am the bread winner and recently she called me stupid which made me so weak.Now i blacklisted her and iam considering a break up.
    Please advise me

  12. Phil

    How really can one handle all these bad marital situations. It is really killing to have a stubborn wife who’s hard to change. It pains me how fellow married brothers are suffering.

  13. c

    Im in the 3rd marriage.
    I had the woman of my life, which I divorced…the mistake of my life but she allowed her mother to mix in our life and changed quite a lot when stared to work…As a girlfriend she was my dream. Never meet again no one like her. At the moment married once more but my present wife is complaining all the time about these and that, very unsatisfied with everything…basically we move abroad to get a higher quality of life…more cash basically but since she hat to gave up on a stressful job and she’s not doing anything at the moment she blames me…indirectly. I try to be patient but somehow my secret desire is to get my first wife back…I don’t want to re-start again my life but somehow I fell quite unhappy with women…I give all my best and after a while they star t to become abusive and demanding. In particular…men are treat like sheep. You try to communicate and its a struggle…If you give your point its because you want to have the reason, if you argue its because you are gifted with words, if you talk its because you talk to much…there is this fear of being alone in the final years of your life…but I almost getting the idea that better being alone than to have these almost daily fights. And sex…forget aboiut it…in particular when they get to late 40’s…menopause, humour…all bullshit just to manipulate…

  14. Chris

    The God that instituted marriage gave every man the key, and that key is that you LOVE your wife. Now this LOVE has so many definitions which include FORGIVENESS and TOLERANCE. When you as the man get to that point of giving up, remember this two words; FORGIVENESS and TOLERANCE and apply them to your marriage. Just as u cannot separate your eyes from your entire body, so also u can no longer separate yourself from your wife because u both are one. Divorce shouldn’t be an option. Your wife is the weak vessel, and you must always LOVE and TOLERATE her forever. FORGIVE her when she wrongs you, and APPRECIATE HER. Don’t concern yourself with whether she is SUBMISSIVE as command by GOD or not, just play your own role and pray to your God. Don’t try to change her, instead be the change that will influence her to change. God never gave you a perfect wife, He gave you a baby in your wife, its your responsibility to make her a woman and a wife. Know for sure that God sees your effort, knows exactly how to make your wife change completely, listens and willing to answer your prayers.

    1. B.O

      CHRIS, thx for these words. I came to this site to find an answer but it looks like there are more worst situations than mine. I shared tears when I read through ur comment as it soothed my hrt and I will apply love, tolerance and forgiveness

  15. sooraj

    May lord almighty bless all of the poor souls stuck with stubborn wife it looks like there is no way out of it then only face the heat till our last breath..

  16. T.Ben

    CHRIS, your comment above is soothing. I will just like to buttress your point. Am married now for 5+ years and I have experience the good, the bad and the ugly side of marriage. I mean, stubbornness and trouble (big time) of the highest order. We still do often times have these issues but it has reduced from unlike when we used to even get to d level of domestic violence. C guys, the truth be told, in situations like this, u need a christian, matured, married and above all EXPERIENCED COUPLE who have been in such situation and HAVE COUNQUERED as REGULAR counsellor. Many times, we (both d husband and wife), we innocently do the things wrongly. You might say your wife is stubborn (from a man’s perspective) and she will say she is not (from a woman’s perspective). Believe u me, YOU ARE BOTH RIGHT. It might not be what u expect to read, but it is the truth. These EXPERIENCED COUPLE will help guide both of u tru d period. The bible is therefor us to follow but how easy is it for a man to love someone who is not submissive? Find an EXPERIENCED COUPLE as counsellor for both of u.

  17. Israel

    Who says life is Boring when you marry a stubborn Wife,i have read through all the write up,almost everyone complain about their stubborn Wife,the truth is we need knowledge and wisdom to manage our home as the head, the reason you aré called a groom on your Wedding Day is because it is your responsibility as a man to groom(nurture,trim,train,teach,educate,prayed for, love,tolerate and so on) from a bride to a Wife,most of the time we want our Wife to Change, be the Change that Will change your Wife,there is no marriage that can ñot succeed, all we all need to understand is to study our individual wifes and pray to God for the wisdom to lead our home, prayer is the key to every life problem whether marital or whatever it may be. I pray that God Will secure everyones marriage in jesus ñame.

  18. N.C

    I am married for 19 years. My wife comes from a family that was ruled by women. Stuborn to the point of crazyness. I love my wife more than my life but I think that mellow talking and trying to explain your opinion is not a solution for such people. The only thing she accepts is an apology. Even that after a while became “how many times will I accept apologies?” she’s been through cancer and I try to keep her calm(it destroyed us financially and we still struggle) . She stopped working, she doesn’t deal with anything outside the house and we split jobs in the house. She hates her parents, my parents (althoughshe clames she loves them?!?!) and everyone she has ever met. She only sees what other people have (always richer). I have never heard from her lips the words “I’m sorry it’s my fault” NEVER. Recently she started looking through the internet her previous boyfriend and lucky me he is rich and successful. The abuse I take for that is unbelievable. 4 days ago after leaving her parents home where I washed and helped her almost paralyzed father, she said to me that if she had stayed with him she would be living abroad with him and she would be happy with kids and wouldn’t have to deal with her parents. I snapped. I told her that if he wanted to be with her he would have to refuse a job with travelling and a job abroad (she refused when I was offered one 15 years ago, but I don’t dare remind her!) so he would just be a worker in a local business near by her home. She hasn’t spoken to me or looked at me ever since. It is now 4 days. I don’t know what else to do but I am also a human being and deserve to be treated with respect. Sorry for the long comment.

  19. JayT

    Soft talk does not work with these types of people/women. I associate a stubborn wife to a mule. You can lead them to water (reasoning) but you cannot make her drink. If the situation does not fit her ideals or comfort zones, she will not bend. She will persist even if it means the death of a family member. Believe me, our kids lives have been on the line a few times due to my wife’s high level of stubbornness and unreasonableness. She will sacrifice the well being of the family to have her way. Very selfish. Her mind becomes locked and there is 0 flexibility. If the request or what is needed is outside her small mental comfort zone, you can forget it. Our kids have suffered in school and in health. Me? Well i’m exhausted. She does not take any accountability. Unbelievable. A person so stubborn and at the same time terrified at being accountable for their mistakes. The mistakes that are usually made are due to her persisting in having things her way. When they crash and burn with consequences to pay,….she is the first one to run behind me. I absorb all of her failings in life. It has cost me time and valuable resources to clean up her messes. Before me she failed with everything she put her hands to. I found this out later after marriage from family and friends. By marrying her I have now become the scapegoat that enables her to run around unaccounted for because I am the one who is absorbing all the consequences. It is the worse thing in the world. IMO, these unreasonable stubborn women need more than flexible talk and reasoning. By trying to reason with these stubborn refusal to reason women, you only wear yourself out to the point of becoming ill. They’re childish and selfish. When it comes to “herself” she does not bend even if your life depends on it. Do you want my solution? What does a man do with a stubborn mule to get production out of it? He beats it. He has no mercy with that mule. That is my solution with anything that is stubborn. That is the only way to get production out of a mule. At some point you are going to have to mentally beat it. If you don’t, these types of women can mentally abuse you. They play mental games of confusion. I am not physical with my crazy wife (its come close) however I do battle with her mentally. It is a war and I’m far superior therefore I win. I bring up her failures to humble her because she’s in a cycle that costs the family resources, time and health. She needs to be reminded when repeating the same mistakes. I don’t hesitate. Once the emotional jargon starts, I soften my approach and explain the reason why things should go a certain way. I also tell her that I too must be reasonable and sacrifice for the greater good of the family. It amazes me how a mother can be so selfish. I was married before. This part was never a problem. When you tangle with a stubborn woman you are dancing with the devil. They have no limits to how far they will go mentally to cover their tracks. It is beyond words and imo, the worst mistake a man can possibly make in life by marrying one of these types of women.

    1. mark

      Oh man, I can relate to that very well! We’ve been together for 8 years, married for 2. She has a daughter, which I have always took care of. I’m in my early 40’s she’s only two years apart but her daughter is mid 20’s already, so i praticaly have 3 adults to feed at home which on the west coast, living by the beach, it gets extremely costly! My wife works but have NEVER spent a dime in our house, not 1 loaf of bread or gallon of milk. Her money is “her” money and she still claims to be a feminist. I pay for all the cars, all the cell phones, all food and insanaly expensive rent out here and she still complains, never satisfied! She is certainly a very beautiful woman but I am tired of carrying a trophy around. She somehow got insane credit cards debts why I try to save money to buy us a house and give us a good quality life. She constantly nags about her house, her car, not enough international travels, not enough spas, gifts, blablabla and constantly get into financial debt always making the worse calls based on her “dreams”, not her reality. Refuses to appologize even when she’s wrong which is most of the cases and play the no-sex game which it drives me nuts! I always have to give in because somehouse I am still in love with this crazy manipulative women. She can be the nicest women with everyone else but me, Im feel like a sheep that needs to work my ass off to cover her needs. Trust me I am very self confident and I tell her how wrong she is and how much she needs to come down and be humble but it never works, she’s extremely stubborn. I get verbably agressive with her sometimes when I can’t stand her games anymore. I am not sure what else to do. I tried pulling back on money, refusing to pay for her things or even taking all the 4 credit cards she has from my accounts and that usually turn things even uglier. I feel trapped and am not sure why I am not strong enough to just run away from this mess.

  20. Joram Arentved

    Are you pls. ‘Christmasbrave(!),’ my only thing’s, as it deserves, my Universality statute, ‘testify(!)’ to being a good optimist, who just seeks to leave this house, my br.-in-law, who always wants to win, note: Why on Earth is his lawyer autom. MY fault?, so I can find out etc., greetings, ‘J.A.,’ Chile

  21. Mashudu theo

    It always seems like we man are weak but its not true woman’s always want things to be on their favour,,we married them not them married us they have to respect and share love with us in a good manner,,,they are Queen’s of stubonness..mashudu mahoha malindi gauteng south africa

  22. Lj

    Waaau. I am going through a similar saddening and stressful marriage situation. J have a stubborn, narrow minded wife with a heart as hard as a stone, Devoid of even the basic common sense of reasoning. Not willing to listen Evn to her own relatives, friends, not even to my own. But am now relieved, to learn here that many women are simply like this. Ooooo!!! This choice I made…!!! Didn’t work out for me, the way I thought it wd…this choice I made…

  23. when i got to the age of 19yrs old, back then in the village, whenever i see a man living alone, i do say, such men are not serious, not until the time i got married. i met her 1999, we exchange love in Tokyo for 2 yrs then, after then till today, no rest of soul,mind etc. its better to be lonely than to put a woman under your umbrella in today world. most men die before their time because they married a bad wife, its better to be lonely than to be hook with fish hook in today world. if you count about 100 houses within your environment today, hardly before you see 30 landlords within the jurisdiction of your environment, their wife’s has sent them to a journey of no returned permanently.

  24. Evan

    I have a question has anymen on here had a successful relationship with there wife’s begin like this .. N if so are u happy now ??

    1. Sara

      All women want their mistakes taken lightly but counterparts as national shame . I have seen for years ,no need to wait nothing would change .men are sexually weaker than women that why they drag the relatioship Instead of thing men should know is in course of time they can overcome any family l loss .go ahead start a new life .your wife is confident enough she can manage without you ,why not you ?

  25. Clefzy

    Hmmmm marriage is easier said than done I am in love with a woman that is extremely stubborn is not ready to admit her fault. I am a very young man who is easy going and used to work in a bank we run a business together while I still work in a bank she registered with her details on the business name she can go to bed with grudges in her heart she is from a polygamous home and she has a boy who is 9 and he loves me so much and she is presently carrying my baby I resigned from my Job so I could assist with the business bcos it brings more to the house well I think I am regretting bcos I sacrifice my Job for hers and now she treats me with no regard I can’t be surprised bcos she is really rude to her own mother so who am I but I loved her that y I left my Job to focus on her bcos she said she does not get enough attention due to my bank Job but right now I am very confused and her own mum is pitying me what do you think I should do.

  26. Olumide

    My is living and caring but she feels she is right all time she disobey and stand she is right never intent to apologize for what she did and stand on never talk until I beg her my self then when having sex she will tells you she is sorry when you beg her first is that right cause am so Mich confuse she gets me angry much of times and make me do what I don’t intent of doing she teaches me more bad things of doing of her bad habit and I don’t want this to cone on up on our child cause she always look at her mother doing all time

  27. Sanj


    if only you guys spent half the energy on trying to understand the women you once upon a time loved instead of complaining on this blog, your lives would be better off!

    Just the fact that you cannot talk to her and crib here explains why the wife is hurt, and therefore being stubborn as defence mechanism to keep herself sane with you.

  28. Sangoma

    How many people does this Earth have? And how many lives do men have? And then what is Love?

  29. del

    Well I have stubborn wife and what I have been experiencing is either treating her of health issues and sex depravation.. We are married for 10years now and from the beginning she warned me I cannot touch her body.Kind pround and yells at me if I attempt to correct her
    She cannot say sorry ,but good at going to church often.
    Am bornagian, she deprived me of sex for a year later show regret, but refuse to change.
    I just pray to God to help my business expand and help me get business and career that will take me from the house once in a while from time to time so I can give her space to enjoy her stubbornness while I keep praying that God will soften her

  30. Abbey

    I need not to worry any longer about my wife stubborness with all have read here today, my case is settled.

  31. robert

    sometimes you must accept that the wife will never change. i tried 12 years and my wife is still the same. i tried it all — nothing worked. i dont want to divorce since we have a child. i found a solution which affords me some happiness. judge me if you want but i promise i tried everything before i got a girlfriend. now i dont really care what the wife says or thinks or does. i am not going to live life with no love or compassion. i dont want to touch my wife because i find it weird to touch someone who is so mean. i stay in the marriage for our son and he thinks everything is ok. he is doing very well. i sing and smile now. it is the last thing i wanted — to be like this; however, after 12 years i realize that you should just find someone who wants to be happy. i honestly feel that there is a point when you need to save yourself, especially if you are over 40. i suggest you do what is right for yourself. not all solutions are the same. judge me if you want but i promise i tried. she broke me mentally and i picked myself up and said never again.

  32. Joseph Martinez

    I have a very stubborn wife I have all my kids with her 4 she works for child protection services. She will never believe me for instance she asked where did my cousins meet I said the grocery store she said no they probably met in college. I said they didn’t go to college and next time let me know what you want me to say so we don’t argue. I’ve always told her Gentle words deflect anger while harsh words make tempers flare. She has mocked me saying that’s not very Christian and I had her phone and she was reading the bad girls Bible. That’s nothing compared to trying to control me and play a victim she called the cops thinking they would drop it nope not the case she lied and i told her what attorney to use she yelled at me told me I was evil Desere Ed to be in jail. She hired an attorney that did not get my case ran concurrently and I went to prison while in prison she like always is quick to go for the kill and said that’s why no one loves you in your family. I didn’t call her for two weeks and she took me a whole prescription of Zanax to prison !!! I told her take those out of here she got my scared what if they catch me so I take them of course I get caught they got her questioning her she never admitted I took the case didn’t want her in trouble lose her job I got 4 years on top of my sentence did I get a thank u nothing. Just last week I asked her at my fathers funeral I was to receive the flag I asked her 3 times please stand over there so you can get video of me receiving flag.Nope I get mad and now she mad because I chewed her out no one yells or gets mad at cleopatra jessica. I even told her behind every great man is a greater woman.

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